Carolina - A Once-Teen Mamacita Creates Her Own Narrative

CAROLINA - A Once-Teen Mamacita Creates Her Own Narrative

No matter your age, becoming a Mamacita is hard, and unfortunately, the role could come with its share of judgments and criticism from others.  Most of the time it’s unintentional, yet it is something some of us often face.  A teen Mamacita will face this type of scrutiny on a grander scale and will also be succumbed to the stigma associated with teen pregnancy. For our January Mamacita, Carolina, this became her reality when she gave birth to her first child at age 16.  Determined to succeed, Carolina kept a positive attitude while facing adversity and proved that teen pregnancy doesn’t have to equate to failure.   

As we so eagerly said goodbye to a year full of challenges, and graciously welcomed a new year with optimism, we highlight this story of a once-teen Mamacita who defied all odds, even while society expected her to fail. Carolina is a Mamacita of three, a Behavior Interventionist, and an advocate for children with disabilities. Working Mamacitas thanks you, Carolina, for your transparency, and for allowing us to share your inspirational story.  

IN HER OWN WORDS - as narrated to Gisset

My husband and I started dating when we were just 13 years old, we were young and in love.  We started to have sexual relations when we were in high school, and although we were aware of the consequences that could come from it, we never expected it to happen to us, but it did.  When I was 15 years old, I became pregnant with my first child. We were shocked and scared.  I felt terrified to tell my parents and shared the news with my mother first. She helped ease the conversation with my father and once the truth was out, they were surprisingly supportive and willing to help both of us through this. My father made it very clear that I would have to grow up and raise a baby but with words of encouragement he said, “ponte las pilas y vamos a echarle ganas.”  At the age of 16, my daughter was born.

The transition to becoming a Mamacita felt natural and didn’t feel difficult for me. I enjoyed the process and learned to figure things out one day at a time. This didn’t mean I didn’t experience my share of challenges or setbacks but I never allowed myself to believe I would fail. The high school I attended had a teen parenting program that offered child care while we were in school. They provided us with the resources to keep up with our studies and required us to attend parenting classes, where we learned about self-love. My days in school were different than the rest of the students because I would skip all of the activities to spend my free time in the nursery with my daughter.  Since I was breastfeeding her, I was summoned out of class to go feed her when she woke up from a nap or get hungry throughout the day. This was my new reality and I embraced it with joy. 

As the months went by, we started to become accustomed to our new life as teen parents.  The demands of raising a baby, school, and home life sometimes left me wiped out. One day, I was so exhausted from the day-to-day that I decided to take a break and lay in bed for a few minutes. To my surprise, I felt fluttery kicks in my stomach and I froze. I was still nursing my daughter and hadn’t had a period since giving birth, the chances of being pregnant seemed impossible. I went to see my doctor to ease my worries and upon taking the test, I learned I was pregnant again. I had an ultrasound shortly after only to discover that I was already six and a half months along. This blew our minds and didn’t give us much time to mentally and physically prepare for what was to come.  I had just turned 17 when my second daughter was born.

I had no other choice but to continue moving forward. I was a senior in high school with two kids.  Both of my babies were enrolled in the daycare program. Most days I would wake up extra early to catch the bus with my girls to make it to school on time. I remember the looks we received while riding the bus from others.  They were stares of judgment which at times felt heartbreaking and discouraging. Luckily, I had the best support system, our families helped keep me motivated and encouraged me to believe that even with two babies in tow, I could still achieve my dreams and goals. I never gave up, I worked hard and always kept my family’s well being in mind when making hard decisions. Even though I was only 17 years old, I was mature enough to understand what was at stake for us.  

Once I graduated from high school, I became a working Mamacita. I decided to put my higher education on hold because I couldn’t allow my parents to be financially responsible for my daughters. My husband started working part-time when we found out we were pregnant with our first, and now that I was able to, I wanted to do my part to contribute financially. I took a job at a school as a Teacher’s Assistant and eventually settled into a career as a Behavior Interventionist advocating for children with disabilities. In my role, I work with students that require help integrating into their social environment and how to cope with the emotional behaviors they struggle with. My students have learned that even though they will still experience failure, if they keep striving forward and never give up, they will succeed. This is something I learned when I was 17.

My husband and I got married eight years ago and have been together for 23 years.  We now have three children, two in college and one in high school. I feel so proud to share that our oldest will be graduating from USC this summer.  My husband and I understand the rarity of a teen couple sticking together for 23 years while raising children and facing so much adversity.  We learned how to keep our friendship and love strong enough to build a solid foundation, and stayed true to the statement, “teamwork makes the dream work.”  For me, success didn’t have to come in the form of an ivy league education or a prominent career, instead, it was growing up alongside my children and being able to root for one another as we achieve all of our dreams and goals.

For all the Mamacitas out there, enjoy and appreciate every stage of your kids lives, time passes too quickly and before you know it, they will be all grown up. Be open with your children and share your personal experiences, it will help build that bridge of open communication with them. Don’t be so hard on yourself, be compassionate, and take care of yourself. Lastly, never forget who you were before becoming a Mamacita, you deserve to keep her spirit alive.

As you can see Carolina is another fierce Mamacita.  She is showing us that a Mamacita is not defined by the expectations of others, she is strong enough to write her own story. May she always keep that vibrant energy alive.

Xoxo - G